Oil Leak or Oil Volcano?

Oil Leak or Oil Volcano?

A few weeks ago I received some information that advanced the theory that the BP oil leak is actually an oil volcano, and that attempts to seal the leak would fail. It appears that the theory may be correct after watching some side by side videos and images.

The BP oil leak on 5.23.2010. Notice the white plume next to the black plume.

An AP video from 5.20.2010 which shows the white plume in the background and what appears to be volcanic ejecta floating down.

Now, video of an underwater volcano “erupting from NOAA’s Submarine Ring of Fire expeditions.” 3.20.2009

So exactly how screwed are we today? I’m so glad that Obama and one of his biggest campaign contributors are handling this crisis. We should be hearing the truth any minute now. (snark)

Feed Your ADHD Turns One!!!!

Feed Your ADHD Turns One!!!!

Dr. Dave of Feed Your ADHD is celebrating his one year anniversary of bringing the best and most inventive snark to the web that I have seen since I stumbled on Shtuey over at Oy….My Valve.   As part of his celebration, he is requesting that fellow bloggers pick a favorite post of his to crosspost, and he will do the same on his site.

I make a valiant attempt to hit particular sites every few days, and Doc’s is one not to miss just because we HAVE to laugh right now!  Bookmark him, and show him some link love!

And without further ado, here is my absolute all time favorite post from Dr. Dave.  Please put down all beverages, and duck for flying blue language. (Tell me this hasn’t happened at your house?!)

When The SS Comes To My House:


Here’s a repost of something I wrote a while back when Chip Harrison’s car got pulled over for displaying a sign that said: “Abort Obama Not the Unborn.”

Given that the president has people telling on their neighbors over at his “flag” email address (hey, pres, FLAG YOU!), I thought it might be fun to revisit what might happen if my neighbors have been telling on me.

I’m pretty sure how it will go….


Two men in black stand rigidly at the door. One reaches out like a dumb friggin’ robot to push the doorbell.


What appear to be explosions erupt inside the house. A vicious dog barks 40 times a second. A chorus of high-pitched screeching approaches the door amid the warnings of the attack dog. The cacophony is so loud one agent puts a hand over his ear. The silhouette of a man becomes clear through the door’s tempered glass. He appears to be bobbing and weaving, as if he were a boxer. He seems to trip… over two smaller silhouettes, and a white amorphous mass, the front of which seems to bounce off the floor like a jackhammer. Up and down. BARK BARK BARK! Up and down. BARK BARK BARK! Up and down.

Secret Service Man #1 reaches his right hand beneath his jacket and flips the catch on his shoulder holster, then returns the hand to his side.

BAM! The man inside slams into the door: Shit!

He fumbles for the locks, frees them, and shouts: Hold on…wait…Dog (real name withheld to protect the guilty)…DAMMIT! DOG!Lucy? LUCY!? (real name again withheld to protect the guilty) CAN YOU GET THIS FRIGGIN’ BEAST OUT OF HERE?

Two smaller silhouettes, apparently young children, seem to be hopping up and down, as if on a trampoline.

The silhouette of (apparently) “Lucy” pulls the amorphous white mass that is “Dog” back into the recesses of the house, the sound of a million paw nails scratching the floor loud, then diminishing, then gone.

[Narrator interruption: I shit you not. This happens any time anyone rings the door bell. Neighbor kid. Pizza man. Church lady. Secret Service.]

The door opens. Just a little. A bespectacled man with wild curly hair pokes his head through the crack.

SS#1: Sir. Are you Dr. Dave ADHD?

Man: Umm…yes. Can I help you?

Secret Service Man #2: We’re with the Secret Service, Mr. ADHD.

Both men extract wallets and flip them open so quickly to reveal identification, the man in the door blinks a few times.

Man: Is that something you learn as freshmen in Secret Service School?

SS#1: Frowns. Sir. We’re here on official government business.

Man: Smiles, like a jackass. Umm…yeah…I got that when you said the words “Secret Service.”

SS#2: Sir. We understand you write a seditious blog. We’re concerned you’re with a hate group. We’d like to come in and look around.

Man: Laughs. And laughs. And laughs.

SS#1: Sir. Can we have a look around…inside?

Man: Laughs. And laughs. And laughs.


Man: Collects himself. Sure. Why the hell not? Welcome to my nightmare!

Man opens the door. Two children swoop past him. From somewhere inside the house, a million paw nails scratch the floor, the sound drawing closer and closer.

“Lucy”: Dog. Dog! Get BACK here!

Man: Laughs. And laughs. And laughs.

SS#1 and SS#2 cross the threshold into the house. The two children block their path. The white amorphous “Dog” jumps between the two children, tail wagging, knocking both of them to the floor.

“Dog” jumps up and plants its paws on SS#1’s chest…and licks SS#2’s trigger hand.

Boy and Girl recover, pull themselves off the floor, and, hopping up and down, again block the path of SS#1 and SS#2.

Boy: Why are you wearing black? Hop. Hop. Hop.

Girl: Yeah. Why? Hop. Hop. Hop.

Boy: Can we have those sunglasses? Hop. Hop. Hop.

Girl: Yeah. Can we? Hop. Hop. Hop.

“Dog” jumps down from SS#1 and jumps on SS#2’s chest…and licks SS#1’s trigger hand.

Man: Laughs. And laughs. And laughs.

SS#1: MR. ADHD. If you could, PLEASE!

Man: Laughs. And laughs. And laughs.

Boy: Did you come to see Daddy’s guns?

Girl: Yeah. Did you?

Boy: My daddy was in the Army!

Girl: Yeah. The Army!

Boy: He hates Obama!

Girl: Yeah. Rock Obama! [Narrator translation: This one thinks “Obama has rocks in his head” sounds better her way.]

SS#1 smiles. So…Mr. ADHD. You’re flying your flag outside upside down. You have a seditious blog. You own guns. You “hate” the president. You want to tell us about your hate?

Man: Laughs. And laughs. And laughs. I’m just a blogger, man. I’m just having fun.

Boy: Want to play football?

Girl: No. Play babies!

SS#2: Sir. Can you do something about these children?

Man: Laughs. And laughs. And laughs. I’ve been trying. For 7 years. That’s why I blog. So I can take my frustration out on dumb people. Your boss just happens to be the dumbest one around. Laughs. And laughs. And laughs.

Girl: Rock Obama!

Boy: I lost my tooth. Grins widely. See?

Girl: Daddy makes fires in the fireplace so I can warm belly? Pulls up her shirt. See?

“Dog” still licks SS#1’s trigger hand.

Boy: Want to see my room?

Girl: No. Mine!

Boy: I like pizza! Do you?

Girl: Yeah. Pizza!

Boy growls. [Narrator: This is an involuntary reflex, we think. Or maybe he really is a monster.]

THUD! Everyone turns around to see Man lying on the floor.

“Lucy”: Hun? Hun, are you okay?

Man was laughing so hard he could no longer stand up. “Dog” hovers over him and starts licking his face.

SS#2 turns to SS#1: Umm…I don’t think this man belongs to any hate group. But he sure isn’t right in the head.

SS#1 turns to “Lucy”: Ma’am. Can we call someone for your husband?

Man stops laughing: Yes. Please! Take me away! I’ll even go to the gulag. Just…get…me…out of here!

Man then laughs. And laughs. And laughs.

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